Clit Notes

I’ve been thinking a lot about my clit.

As I play with more new partners, I continue to search for the best words and images to help them understand what I like best, what actually brings me to orgasm. When I was a little girl, long before I knew what I was doing, I masturbated by squeezing my legs together, one leg wrapped around the other. As I matured, I tried other methods, turning household objects into sex toys, using my fingers, but I always returned to squeezing my legs in increasing pulses of muscle clenches. It always delivered that amazing feeling that I was wanted.

When I started playing with partners, I enjoyed everything we did: finger fucking, oral sex, penis/vagina intercourse, but none of these things brought me to that place that I could achieve so easily just by squeezing my legs together. When a partner would pay special attention to my clit, sometimes it felt great, but sometimes it was painfully ticklish, and I would wind up pushing them away, not knowing how to guide them. I began to analyze what I was feeling when I squeezed my legs together. How could I figure out how to show my partners how to get me off? I believed strongly that I deserved orgasms as part of partner sex, but I just didn’t know what worked, other than this obviously solo game of leg squeezing. I worked more with my fingers, messaging my clit, fucking myself with my fingers, and I bought my first vibrator. I quickly found that fucking myself with the vibrator felt great, but it wouldn’t bring me to orgasm. But if I clutched the vibrator between my legs, near, but not directly on, my clit, I could jerk myself off very easily. I realized that what I needed was strong pressure around my clit, but not directly on it. The pulse of the vibrator, or of my clenching and unclenching legs, provided exactly that.

As I began to play with my beloved C, and sex became more adventurous and fun than ever, he helped me with my exploration. I could tell him when the touch was too direct, and it made me uncomfortable rather than hot, and he would adjust until he found the right spot. I discovered that I loved the combination of penetration and clitoral simulation: his fingers fucking me, his thumb, sometimes joined by my fingers, rubbing that area above my clit.

I owe a lot to Ducky Doolittle, the amazing sex educator and former web cam girl. This is why you should continue going to great sex ed classes throughout your life. I thought I knew so much, but she was the first one to really explain the full extent of the clitoral anatomy: legs, shaft, hood, and all. I found this video link on Ducky’s site, from the legendary queen of masturbation Betty Dodson (and via Susie Sexpert herself, Susie Bright). This explains it much better than I could. I love these women! This diagram from wikipedia is also helpful.

Now I had a visual image of the internal anatomy of pleasure, and I could really begin to understand what was happening and what was working. I rub the area just above my clit, from the edge of the hood, up into my pubic mound. Throughout that area I can feel my erect clitoral shaft, and directly simulating that is what leads me most satisfyingly to orgasm. If I place the head of my Hitachi Magic Wand against that area, turn it up to full, and press down hard, I can orgasm in a minute. Not to say I’m always striving for such instantaneous efficiency in an orgasm, but knowing how that works helps me in other situations. I can create this stimulation with my fingers too, or someone else’s, if guided to the right spot.

Recently, I was playing with a lovely partner, and he’d fucked me good and hard with a couple of fingers, made me squirt and squeal. Then he bathed me with the warmth of his tongue, and I floated in the bliss of that. But then I wanted a mind-blowing clitoral orgasm to top off the night. He’s such a good student, this one. I showed him, simply, where to rub. People came running from the other playroom down the hall to watch the aftermath as I moaned and screamed with pleasure. So simple. Yet so infinitely complicated. Every woman different…

To be continued.

Après Soirée Musings

It was a great party. I’m not ready to write about my adventures in detail. I need to mull things over for a while. Enjoy having them to myself. Then, sometimes, eventually, they bubble up into blog entries. Sometimes not. This blog doesn’t exist to immediately chronicle every sex act in which I partake. I may be spending a good part of this year figuring out what IS the raison d’être of this blog, but I know that’s not it.

There are some thoughts bubbling over, however, from the weekend. I really like the dinner party/sex play party format. It creates a comfortable, casual atmosphere to begin the evening. It does mean that you have to just allow for a digesting period. I ate too much, despite my best efforts. The food was so good. Some people were already running upstairs to play, and I just wasn’t ready. Instead of getting frustrated, I got some fresh air in the back yard, drank some soda, and waited. Soon, I was ready.

I was feeling Toppish most of the night. My outfit worked out well for that. I stayed dressed for a long time, mainly playing the voyeur and occasionally reaching out to touch from the fortress of my clothes. Then I shed my blouse and skirt, and was very happy in my black panties, stocking, and boots. And with my favorite toy. I looked and felt quite the Domme, and had a lot of fun with that. Then I reached a point in the evening when I was ready to allow myself a different kind of pleasure, so I removed panties, stockings, and boots, and spread myself out for someone else. I enjoy deciding when to let go of control. That means I decide when I want to be touched. I really can’t let anyone touch my tits or pussy when I’m feeling Toppish. I’m so sensitive; a brush of my nipples or clit makes me lose control too quickly. Good things to know, and with which to play.

I enjoy playing with people I already know at parties. I won’t shut myself off to the chance electric encounter with a stranger, but it’s not my main goal at a party. To play with someone whom I know fairly well, and with whom I’ve shared a simmering of mentioned or unspoken desire, but have not yet had the opportunity to explore that desire… for that exploration to happen at a party, that is really the best scenario.

I must reiterate one of the points on the freaksexual post I linked to in my last entry: don’t get too drunk at a sex play party! It’s very unpleasant for the other people there, and it WILL NOT get you laid. I’m not saying don’t drink. I like a little liquor lubrication myself. But know your limits.

Published in: on January 15, 2008 at 2:01 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Still Standing

“Can I tie up your hands?” C asked, having just completed a lovely tie on my tits. “Sure,” I said, shivering with pleasure as Serge attacked my tits. He sucked and pawed with a hungry intensity, and I gave my tits to him with delighted abandon. C rapidly bound my hands behind my back. He’s getting very good at this.

Then he did something different. He lay down on the floor and slid between my legs, spreading them, helping me to a wide, strong stance (oy, can I use that phrase?) My opened pussy was directly above him. He stroked a lubed finger over my pussy lips, gently working it inside me. Having lubed me up, he pulled out his finger, and shocked me with the thrill of cold metal. He held my favorite toy, the metal vibrator, and ran its chilly hardness along my hot cunt.

Serge pulled my hair, tilting my head back, and kissed me roughly. My legs wobbled.

C pushed the cold, vibrating metal right into me. From his unique vantage point on the floor, he could watch every movement of the vibrator pushing through my fleshy folds and into the place where my greedy cunt pulled it in.

Serge continued to control my upper body by pulling my hair, alternately ravaging my tits then my mouth. My hands bound behind me, C pulled down on the rope with his free hand, making it even harder for me to move. My legs shook uncontrollably, as I rocked against the vibrator with my hips, the only part of my body I could still maneuver. So maddeningly near to some kind of release.

I’ve never managed to orgasm standing up, but I got exquisitely close. Perhaps next time.

Sorry for the posting lag… I’m entering a new phase of my creative life, a big time of transition, and something always has to suffer. But thank you so much for the continued linking and traffic, and I’ll do my best to make up for the silence.

Published in: on September 29, 2007 at 11:40 pm  Comments (4)  

New Toy

New Toy 1

I bought a new toy last night. It is a riding crop covered in lavender glitter. It makes me very happy. It’s pretty, vicious, and will leave a nice trail of sparkles on somebody’s ass. I wonder who?

I was inspired to do a little modeling with my new toy.

new-toy-2.jpg

Yes, I just got a new manicure and pedicure. And yes, I LOVE pink and purple and sparkles.

There are a few other pics, but I’m not sure if I’m ready to put them out on the interweb yet.

Published in: on August 5, 2007 at 11:12 pm  Comments (9)